Empty Nest (5/15/2006)

EMPTY NEST! ...Only 13 Days Old...and they
are up and AWAY! (5/15/2006)  
I went out this morning to check on my little birdies and I startled one right out of the nest. It was Big-Bubba. He flew a few feet, and then landed on the steps. He hopped around the yard for a while testing out his wings and then flew away. Each time he tried to return to the nest, his parents chased his away. I guess Robins aren't as willing to let their young come home once they have left the nest.

The second little one was soon to follow Big-Bubba's example and flew straight across the street and began to feast in the neighbors yard.
The third baby took his time and needed a little prodding from mom and dad. They hung out in the grass with him for a while and flew back and forth demonstrating the skill. Finally, he joined the others feeding on seed and worms across the street. The fourth and last little birdie, Tiny Tim, was the smallest of the bunch and was of course on the bottom of the heap. He fell back asleep after just a few minutes. I stood to leave him to rest and scared the poop out of him - literally - as he flew away. He only made it as far as the street and then had a crash landing that was followed by a tumble - talons over beak. He was a bit shook up, as was I. I was afraid that he was hurt as he just sat there, a bit dazed for a couple of minutes in the middle of the road. I was worried a car was going to come by and smash him. BUT, after a moment to collect himself, he fluffed his wings and flew into a nearby tree.

Now the entire family is happily feasting around the neighborhood. I hear their chirps all around.

Oh what fun it has been to watch the whole thing!

9 DAYS OLD! (5/11/2006)

9 DAYS OLD! (5/11/2006)
Can you believe how big they are in such a short amount of time? Their eyes are open, but they sleep a lot. I chat with them regularly so they are familiar with my smell and sound. They watch me intently and aren't too fond of the camera....Odd, they should be used to it by now.

A friend of mine asked if I had named them. I haven't found that I have been inspired to call any of them by name....well, except for the largest one. I call him BIG BUBBA. He is first to poke his head out for food and he always seems to be on top of the feather heap.

Kozmo doesn't seem too interested in them as they aren't "tweeping" yet. BUT, he is very interested in what exactly I am doing on the front porch so often. He watches me with a very inquisitive look through the front door.

I'm sure they will be out of the nest very soon!

Here's to life and nature, and the small joys that we derive!

ME...MY LIFE...MY HEALTH...MY HEART...MY INTENTION...MY HOPE. (5/9/2006)

ME...MY LIFE...MY HEALTH...MY HEART...MY INTENTION...MY HOPE. (5/9/2006)

It seems that I am constantly battling my health. For the one moment of comfort that I have, there are 20 moments of pain and discomfort that follow. I keep asking, hoping and wishing for a time that I will be - "MYSELF" again. I desire and LONG for something that I can recall in my mind as free. Free of pain, free of worry, free of guilt, free of dissatisfaction, free of my current bonds.

The funny thing is, I know...this IS me! I AM myself! I am HERE! This is NOW! But I still can't let go of the other.

I have done yoga before. But this time, I started the practice knowning that I needed to leave all my previous skill and knowledge behind. I knew that I was different now. I have a different body-vessel than the last time I practiced, not to mention I have grown in my life experience.

Yet, despite that realization, I find that I feel defeated in the things that I can't do. I feel anguish when my physical body does not respond as I wish it would. I am unable to let go and accept what I am feeling in this moment. I am attached to a feeling that I can't quite recall. How do I let go of that? How do I accept the inadequacies and failures and yet still find growth?

I know what I am supposed to feel, but can't help but feel a sense of loss. I feel empty. I feel sad.
I am in search of the personal power to thankfully and lovingly acknowledge and accept where I am. I am search of the personal power to continue on and to grow.

I ask for love and light, and wish the same to all.

A Practice (5/9/2006)

A PRACTICE - Def. Something that you work repeatedly in order to acquire or polish a skill.

Over and over again I have to reacquaint my conscience mind with this definition as I practice yoga and re-learn to live my life. The fundamentals have changed, and as I am learning, will continue to change. It is the ability to enjoy the moment I am living without becoming attached to it that will bring me greater balance and accomplishment in my life.

I was reminded of this during my yoga class today. I found it difficult to focus, release, relax and stay in the moment. I felt a sense of frustration in what seemed to me to be a relapse, or steps backwards in my progress. Oddly enough, this particular class was drawn to a close by having all the students sum up and express their experience. After relaying my observation, my instructor reminded me that there will be ups and downs, ebbs and flows in my practice. Some days will be wonderful. Others will be good. While still others will leave me with a sense of longing. It is by means of awareness that we accept each experience for what it is and move on. As stated in the Tao, we should not become attached to a feeling or judge our current moment based on previous experiences. We should however, accept each experience, being in the moment in it's entirety. Feeling the here/now, yet not building an expectation that we may become attached to. This could be very damaging and will hinder our own movement and connection with our being.

Again, I am finding that there is more to be learned with each breath. Always another way to see, understand and accept a moment, thought, or feeling.

I initially began the practice of yoga with the intention of better physical health. It is only in the continued practice that I am seeing that the physical benefits are simply an outward sign of the inner healing and peace that can be found by continuing to work at this practice.

Today I wish gentle thoughts of caring to all. May your mind and body find peace.

My Ode to the Robins (5/8/2006)

Not quite a week old, but growing so fast!

Tomorrow will mark the one-week birthday of these little birdies, yet they are already so big. I'm having a bit of seperation anxiety thinking about them leaving the nest already! I've become quite attached to them, even though they aren't the cutest sort of baby out there. They are still precious and fun to watch.

The momma and daddy Robin are always diligently feeding their little ones. It is amazing how much they eat. It is no wonder they are as big as they are already. The momma still sits on them to keep them warm, but many times they get their necks stuck outside the nest, poking out from under her feathers, looking rather sadistic if you ask me.

We haven't noticed much chirping yet, but their eyes are open and they are starting to move their wings a bit. I'm sure it won't be long till they are trying to fly away. All four of the eggs she laid hatched and so far, each of them had survived.

My Ode to the Robins

My feathered friend

found safety on my stoop.

A nest was built

and pretty blue eggs left.

Come rain or shine

She weathered the days away.

Now hatched into life

They eat and sleep all day.

My sweet little birdies

Soon to spread their wings and fly away.

By Autumn Shishon Stinton

A Poem - I'll Meet You In My Dreams (5/4/2006)

I awoke from a dream this afternoon, heart heavy but INSPIRED to write this poem.

I'll Meet You In My Dreams
by Autumn Shishon Stinton

Oh gentle one with open heart...
I'll meet you in my dreams.
I close my eyes and know my part...
I'll meet you in my dreams.

My life so full so much to share...
I'll meet you in my dreams.
Watch over you because I care...
I'll meet you in my dreams.

I know your name I see your smile...
I'll meet you in my dreams.
In my arms for just a while...
I'll meet you in my dreams.

I see the things that we will do...
I'll meet you in my dreams.
Yet wake to find that I am blue...
I'll meet you in my dreams.

We know each other, our hearts like one...
I'll meet you in my dreams.
To stay together Oh, what fun...
I'll meet you in my dreams.

I think of you most every day...
I'll meet you in my dreams.
Until the time you come to stay...
I'LL MEET YOU IN MY DREAMS!

In Contradiction There is but Harmony (5/4/2006)

In Contradiction There is but Harmony (5/4/2006)

I appreciated the comment my friend made on my last post regarding the strength of an egg shell. While so fragile, the shell does in fact contain all the strength that it needs to promote life. What an amazing lesson for us to learn. We are given everything that we need. Not only to survive, but of even greater importance....to THRIVE!

We would all do well to ask ourselves if our eyes are open to the gifts that we possess. The magic of life is that we have all that we need. It may even be said that when looking at the very things that contradict themselves, there is harmony. Can harmony be found in a paradox? The egg shell is a perfect example of such a contradiction. While weak and so fragile, it is strong and supportive.

There are many such ironies in life. How does one live their life in a sage-like manner; detached, yet compassionate; enjoying life, yet not clinging to it; being a perfectionist, yet indifferent to success or failure; honorable, yet not reaping self-honor; living a life of the highest moral order, yet ignoring ethics and morals; achieving much, yet not striving; knowing the answers, but remaining silent needing no accommodation; being innocent like a child, yet displaying incredible inner strength?

This way of life is one of great practice, and one that is envied by many. Developing a spiritual closeness to nature brings about harmony with the natural rhythm life. When you pursue this balance, you will feel the ebb and flow of life's tides. It is said that in this there will be calmness and and tranquility. Why would I want anything but this?!

This is what I am in search of. Really, though, who isn't in search of this? I know that by opening my heart and mind, I am connecting to my spiritual side and it is only in balance that I will find harmony in my life. In regards to my life course and purpose, I choose to be a warrior! A peaceful warrior, knowing that I must have warrior-like courage in conquered myself. Not clinging to life, or any "thing" in it. By practicing this, I will be unintimidated and able to face impossible odds and adversaries that will come my way in life with grace and courage.

Life is labeled by many as a "mystery." Those who endeavor to understand it, don't...those who chase it, loose it. Those who define it, get confused. Look for it, and it can't be seen. Listen, and you won't hear it. Reach for it , and you will be unable to grasp it. BUT...LIVE LIFE and it will nourishes and complete you.

Whatever you prefer to call the powers that be, they are everywhere, nowhere, everything, and nothing. You can't conjured it up by being well read. It is not a riddle that will be solved by intellectuals. It is not a concept that can be defined in philosophy.It is not a dogma written about by theologists. It won't be found under a microscope in a lab by scientists. It is not buried in your inner-most psyche. But, in the same sense, it is all of these things combined.

KNOW what it is that you believe, and RESPECT what it is that others believe. In this, you will hind harmony in life.

It really is quite simple. Don't over think things. Don't live beyond this moment. THIS is your life. Now...THIS is your life. Now...THIS is your life.....get the picture? Life is right now. Not yesterday, not ten minutes from now, or ten years from now. THIS IS LIFE! LIFE IS TO BE LIVED. There is no, "rest of the story." There is my friends, only NOW. You either live it, or you don't.

Wishing you life.

BABY BIRDS have arrived! OH how sweet it is! (5/3/2006)

BABY BIRDS have arrived! OH how sweet it is! (5/3/2006)

On Tuesday morning we noticed the arrival of 3 little Robins.

Later that day, all 4 had hatched. They respond to our voices and reach for food whenever they hear us. They are so fragile and sweet. You can't help but marvel at the wonder of nature and the beauty of life.

Let there be JOY, HAPPINESS and LIFE!

Making Peace...A Reconciliation Meditation (5/1/2006)

Making Peace...A Reconciliation Meditation (5/1/2006)

This past weekend, while struggling with an issue that is a great source of irritation in my life, I decided that I needed help working through my feelings. I am very cognizant of my feelings and my passions in this particular matter. I also understand that these exact feelings are the ones that may be standing in the way of clarity, causing my actions to be less than wise.

I again found myself wallowing in a conundrum. How do I keep my passion for justice and socially acceptable behavior without succumbing to outrage? Can I maintain strong opinions, and stand up for what I believe in, yet still promote harmony? I know that this turmoil I am feeling is anything but healthy, but how do I balance my beliefs and the differences and extremes that others force into my life?

In an attempt to quite my mind, I picked up a magazine that lay beside the couch. Randomly, paged through it, not really absorbing anything as my mind was still reeling. Iwas flushed with irritation.

I smile now to think that it just happened that I came to focus my attention on an article entitled, MAKE PEACE. I still have those moments of disbelief, but really, RANDOM should never be in our vocabulary. We are given what we need when we need it. I don't believe there are RANDOM acts - but that is a whole other topic! I better focus here before I get way off track....

This article was PERFECT for the feeling I was encountering and the frustration that I was drowning in. The article helped describe how to restore the sacred to your thought process. How? Simply be means of RECONCILIATION.

Reconciliation means to restore to compatibility or harmony or to make consistent or congruent. That sounds more intense than it really is. The idea is quite simple and very calming. When you practice reconciliation in your life, you accept that in each moment or experience there are differences, some painful even. No doubt, there will be polarities between you and others and in many aspects of your life. However, rather than allowing your heart to become closed to the other, you must continually seek to align your mind and heart to include and accept them just as they are.

That concept will enable you to stay in the practice of the here - now. Practicing reconciliation is the softening of your heart to accept this moment and whatever it may contain, just as it is. This intention is the wish to be connected to the present moment despite any differences, and to find harmony there.

Easier said than done? YES! But, it is a starting point for me to work on freeing my heart, and likewise working toward loving kindness and an unencumbered heart. Wouldn't that be gloriously freeing to my spirit!?!

So, it is with an open heart that I am willing to continually try and reconcile, not clinging to my views, but opening my mind to accept and RESPECT the ideas and beliefs of others. This I will do because I expect it from others.

May I be reconciled....Wishing all beings everywhere can find reconciliation.